Today is my last day at work. I can’t believe that it’s already been a year. In ten days I’m starting working with adults like I did before and I really look forward to it. All though I never found my calling working in the school system, I have still learnt a lot. And I have also been very happy with the people I’ve met here. They have always been nice and comfortable to be around.
We had lunch together for the last time today. I brought two cakes I struggled with yesterday. To my surprise, my leader had made a cake also, and I almost started to cry. She held a speech where she said so many nice things about me, so I really feel like they are satisfied with the work I’ve done here. The rest of the day has been full of hugs and nice conversions, and this evening some of us will go out and have a drink to say properly goodbye.
We have reached the top of the mountain, and are preparing to walk down again. There is only one problem: Fog is enveloping the mountain, making it difficult to orient ourselves as we start making our way back. We have to turn around a lot of times, and try new paths. Me and my best friend, do our best. We ask people walking upwards, where they come from and continue optimistically. But still, we get lost. A sign points us in a direction that goes nowhere. Suddenly we are surrounded by threes, and my friend remarks that this is what she loves about walking in the mountain. The unrealistic and somewhat dreamy quality of the landscape. The fog makes it even more beautiful. I nod in agreement. It is truly mesmerizing, and I feel alive even if I am a bit afraid that we won`t find the right path and eventually arrive somewhere far away from where we started walking. We pull out our cellphones, and try to let the GPS point us in the wrong direction. After walking around in a circle and through some muddy waters, we finally find a path. And as if in a miracle, we come down not where we started, but a bit further to the right. As it happens, this is actually closer to where we had parked the car, and we sigh in relief. I tell her, that this was the best thing that could happen: We got lost, but found a new way that was actually better. She tells me it was a great trip. For her, mediation is walking.
It is noticing all the small details around her, and I agree. I have tried Yoga, but somehow it does not appeal to me. I like reading, I like walking and I like having time to think while also doing something else. Some people say that walking in the mountains and listening to music at the same time, is not really relaxing. But who can decide what is relaxation? People are different and have different needs. After the trip, I felt great. Like some part of me had awoken from a slumber. The fog did not confuse me. It reminded me that being lost means having a opportunity to find new paths. To arrive somewhere we could not imagine before we started. Being shrouded in mysteries, gives us perspective. By feeling confused, our brain have an unique opportunity to look at things a different way.
And we found our way. Just not in the way we imagined.
When I close my eyes, I hear them scream. I see them running, trying to save their lives. I can also see the 10 children who stood no chance and died.
The terrorism in France scared me. But not just that, it breaks my heart. The 22 of July Anders Behring breivik shot and killed innocent teenagers on Utøya. The tradgey is that there is no time to heal the traumas, since another act of terror triggers all who’s lost somebody to terrorist-attacks again. I can not imagine what the ones left behind must be feeling right now. But I can cry. Even if it doesn’t help them, I know the support the families and friends needs, will be provided. Because in even the most horrific situations, there will always be people ready to do all they can to support and help those left behind.
In Norway we tried so hard to not show hate, but love. We wanted to be strong together, and knew that the only thing we could do is to counterattack by the weapons we had available: Our empathy and love. After the terrorism in Norway, we started to volunteer more. We wanted to do something, we NEEDED to do something. To find meaning in the meaningless. And I do hope many in France will do the same. Because terrorism doesn’t occur in a vacuum. There is a reason that extremist become who they are. France is a hard country to live in for many refugees. They are lonely and desperate and easy targets for ISIS. So they find comfort in what they feel are the only alternative: A group that brainwashes them and provide companionship. Even if it’s hard for me, and others, to accept that people can do evil things, we must not sink to their level. Fear is dangerous and polarize society even more. We can’t think that the solution is to send all refugees home. We must work together to find solutions that bind people together.
Luckily, Norway has been blessed. We have a system that tries to integrate refugees into the society. We try to do something about problems before lonely and angry people goes to the step where violence feels like the only option. We are also blessed with millions who are able to respond with love in the worst circumstance. Because we truly do our best to take care of everyone. There are not many murders in Norway, compared to many other countries, but we do fail to prevent many tragedies too. We have no ‘perfect solution’ that will wipe away all the problems we have. But we try our best.
But before we can start solving our problems we must take time to grieve. Grieve over the ones who lost everything they had. The ones who will never see smile on their children`s face and hold them tight. Only then can we start to make changes, to make the world a better place. Because, even if there has been over 200 terrorist attacks the last year, there could have been more. we don’t need to go far back in time to see this: The Holcost killed so many that it’s unfathomableb. My wish is that we can answer the hate by not hating the people who don’t terrorize others, refugees and citizents who come to us in need. Because most of them mean no harm. At the same time we must protect ourselves, but I honestly believe that the best way to protect is to collaborate and find new solution that bring us closer together.
Thank you “Locked Thoughts” for nominating me for the Liebster Awards. She has a wonderful blog, so be sure to check it out!
I am always grateful when I`m nominated for awards. It is a bit unreal: I stumble forward in the blogosphere, trying to share my thoughts about psychology and trauma without too many writing errors. But apparently, some readers are satisfied with what I am producing. I hope this blog has been an inspiration or interesting read for you, especially since I soon will take some time off from blogging to concentrate on writing a book version of this blog. But first things first: I will answer the questions Locked Thoughts gave me, and nominate my 11 blogs for the rewards. If you are nominated, you will find the rules at the end of the post. I would love to nominate more blogs, but rules are rules! But know that I appreciate all my readers.
My answers to Locked Thoughts questions:
1) What is that inanimate object you may like to change yourself into? A good book.
2) Do you like chameleons? Yes, they are fascinating!
3) Do you like yourself? Be it yes or no, why? I guess we all have sides we like and sides we don`t. Mostly I am proud of who I am today, but occasionally I don`t like myself. Especially when I think about some memories of my past. But then I remember I did not know then, what I know now.
4) What or who makes you happy? In other words, What is your source of happiness? My friends and family. And following my dreams
5) What is better? Sea or forest? Why? The Sea. Is there anything more calming than the waves and the endlessness of it all?
6) If you were to live in another place other than your birthplace, where would that be? Italy! I am learning the language, and have travelled there many times. I will move there at some point.
7) Considering you had the power to establish a new norm or new idea in this society of ours, what would that be? That everyone should try to do one random act of kindness to another every week.
8) Does gore scare you? Yes? No? Why? Depends! I have a blood phobia, but otherwise I am not easily scared by what the body produces.
9) If you had to have one of your body part amputated, what would that be?
In other words, What body part can you live without? My brain, no question!
10) What keeps you going? My idealism and need to heal.
11) What is your idea about death? I don`t want to die. But when I do, I want to die knowing that I followed all my dreams and did everything I could for the people I love.
11 random facts about me:
- I have tryphophobia
- I must sprinkle everything with salt
- I have travelled to Europe, Asia, Africa and America.
- I am half-german
- I love buying shoes and have far too many
- I listen to audiobooks every day
- I like my “patients” so much I sometimes find it hard to let them go.
- I am extremely clumsy
- I always multi-task
- I have tried Yoga, but not felt that it was for me
- I love playing board-games
My nominees (in random order):
1. I recently discovered this blog: “I sing the body electric” and can really relate to it
2. The journey of my left foot. We have been following each other for a while, and I truly appreciate his feedback and writing
3. Dave Dubay. A man with a lot of questions he tried to answer. A really interesting blog!
4. A plot for thoughts. Many interesting posts here!
5. Anthony Turi. A friend, inspirator and idol of mine.
6. The daddy blitz. If you want to read advice about child-rearing or simply want to read quality-post, this blog is it!
7. Barrywax. One of my most loyal readers. I have read his book, and am always in awe when it comes to his writing-skills and intelligent mind.
8. Musings of a man woman. This is a brilliant blog, so just be sure to check it out!!
9. Therapy Views. A blog from a therapist. Very interesting and packed with information about everything!
10.The world according to Dina. Norwegian blogger who speaks right to my heart.
11. A bipolar journey through the rabbit hole. Even the name of the blog shines with brilliance.
- If you could do one thing that you always have dreamt of, what would it be?
- What makes you calm?
- Have you done random acts of kindness?
- What really irritates you?
- What music do you like?
- What is the most extreme thing you have done?
- Do you prefer to be alone or with others?
- What is your best memory?
- What is the best book you have read?
- What is your favorite animal?
- What scares you?
Things to do when nominated :
1) Thank the blogger who nominated you ( As if that’s a news. That’s basic courtesy.-_-)
2) Display the award somewhere on your blog or post. ( Yes. You are right. Show it off fellas)
3) Answer the set of 11 questions provided to you by the blogger. (Courtesy)
4) Post 11 random facts about yourself. (Avoid things like, ‘I can brush’, I mean that’s cool random stuff but eh… okay fine you can.)
5) Choose 11 bloggers below 1000 followers (Partiality. :3 )
6) Create your own set of questions for the nominees.