For me, emotions have meaning. Me and my mother loved watching sappy movies together, and that must have been when I learned how life CAN be: Full of tragedy. But it can also be get better, at the end. I learned: No matter how bad and sad it is, it will eventually work out fine. Maybe that`s why I never have run away from love, because I would rather hurt than not feel anything at all. I have sought emotions actively, and now I am so lucky I get to work with it, every day as a psychologist. I get touched by how people fight, I get a bit mad when I hear how unfair someone has been treated (but containing it, like psychologists must do) and feel energetic at the end of the day. I cheer and yell inside when someone accomplish a change they wanted. This change can be finally saying the unsaid, crying in front om someone they think will hate them, or feeling depression lifting, just a bit.
Even if it might feel small to them, it`s big if you think about it. It`s like one of my supervisors said when I was at the neurorehabilitation clinic: Even if wiggling a little toe, can sound like a small thing, it’s really amazing, because it means the hard work led to something that wasn`t before. It’s a step in the right direction, and that memory can never be taken from you. I feel that way, every time my patient do something new; If they choose not to overeat, if they open their mouth to say they are afraid, if the stop drinking one of 4 days. It doesn`t mean that everything will be good, but it means it is potential there, and potential means hope. Hope is the most wonderful thing, if no one believed the “impossible” where would we be today?
I am not afraid of emotions. Of course there can be too much of it at times, but if someone shout at me over the phone, I rather try to see it from that persons side (is it easier to be mad than to show vulnerability?) than to run and hide. People seeking help, are doing just that. They want something to change, and I can help them if they want to. The have already taken the first step, they are tired of running and hiding and want to face whatever ghosts they tried to leave behind. When they finally do, they are heroes, each and every one of them. My job is to understand the hardship of this struggle, and try to give them the best veapons available.
I have to let them go their way, but I can show them what I think. I can say it is okay to try even if it`s scary. I can encourage and share the pain with them, because I know personally that it`s worth it.
The thoughts so far remind me of one of my favorite movies; The bothersome man.
It’s about a man “doomed” to live in a place where no feelings exist, no good ones and no bad ones either. ( http://politfilm.wordpress.com/2012/10/20/the-bothersome-man) This turns out to be a nightmare, and honestly, I do agree. If I didn`t feel how good it can be to have a cup of tea after a busy day, what`s the point? I actually feel symptahy for people who because of some reason or another, simply are numb, and don`t have any feelings. A lot of people getting medication worry about this, and sometimes I really can see the argument. If we get better and better at removing all bad emotions, will the good be removed too? Will we stop caring for the world at all? Be completely indifferent?
If we never got “mirrored” when we feel anger, sadness or other feelings, we can develop holes that are harder to heal than bruises on the outside. Without feelings, there is no fuel. No fuel that propel us towards the goal of a better world.
- Are we caught in a happy trap? (theage.com.au)
- Why We Eat When We’re Not Hungry (healthbeauty4426.wordpress.com)
- i’m not qualified. but here is my life advice. (kandidlykatie.wordpress.com)
- Day 7: Emotion Put your energy in motion (danielleonadiet.com)
- Some myths about recovery (tacklingbpd.com)
- Depression – Working your way OUT… There is HELP (happinessrevolution.wordpress.com)
- Things are not always black and white… (champagneandstarz.wordpress.com)
- Understanding Fear and Sadness (celestiallifecoaching.wordpress.com)
Great idea from a blogger who want to inspire people to be there for others! A small way to make a contribution:)
Sometimes when I’m doing my re-blogging on Tumblr, and endlessly scrolling through the dashboard, I come across something that makes me feel – ‘yes, this is important.’ It’s a simple way of saying – ‘I’m here, and I’ll listen.’
This is for everyone who stumbles across my blog, or reads it regularly, who makes me feel all warm and fuzzy when you ‘like’ my blog posts or even – hey – comment. People who need someone to vent to or who need a friend, just for a moment, or forever. No matter how far away you are. I’m a good listener. I won’t judge you or think any less of you if you’re going through something.
‘This is hopebird.
Hopebird is a…
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I have written some posts on dissociation, and even if people might feel this song has nothing to do with it, it still highlights one fact about dissociation: Dissociation means that we have different parts with their own unique abilities, weaknesses and strengths. Aguilera sings about the strong ones, and together they make an army. You have the wise, strong and the fighter. The point is also that when you are one of them, the others are in the background. A “fighter” would be in that mode, ready for attack with all that means in form of thoughts, feelings and actions. When you go from one mode to another, you “switch”. We all do it, so it`s not as otherworldly as the word dissociation suggests.
Enjoy the song, your time and yourself.
Lyrics to the song. Notice the “parts” she sings about in the chorus.
I’ve been standing where you left me
Praying that you’d come and get me
But now I’ve found my second wind
Now I found my second skin
Well I know what you were thinking
You thought you’d watch me fade away
When you broke me into pieces
But I gave each piece a name
One of me is wiser
One of me is stronger
One of me is a fighter
And there’s a thousand faces of me
And we’re gonna rise up
For every time you broke me
Well you’re gonna face an army
Army of me
Welcome to my revolution
All your walls are breaking down
It’s time you had a taste of losing
Time the table’s turned around
I see a glimpse of recognition
But it’s too late, yes it’s too late
And what you though was your best decision
Just became your worst mistake
So how does it feel
To know that I beat you?
That I can defeat you ?
Oh. how does it feel ?
It sure feels sweeter to me
Army of me
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I work together with a young man who has started a private clinic in our town. He treats people with different sort of pain, and I help him with some of the patients. Pain is maybe the most psychological phenomena on earth, which is no wonder if you think about it. People born without pain, die early because they don´t stay away from things that hurt them. They don`t learn that it`s dangerous to touch a stove, and don`t seek shade from the sun if the skin burns. They might recognize that something`s not right, by observing blood pumping from a wound, but if the wound is not possible to spot, they won´t seek help before the loss is too great. Without pain we can`t live, so it`s not really strange that we have perfected its function. In addition to stimuli from the outside, pain is also regulated from our insides. People know how pain-killers can reduce a throbbing head, and opioids has been used for decades for numbing the senses to a degree that leads to dangerous addictions. But pain can be relieved with our minds, too. This video shows a woman in Iran using hypnosis because of an allergic reaction to anesthesia so that she can get a Cesarean. This shows an extreme example of how powerful the mind can be.