The sound of help losing my mind

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Chameleon (Margaret Berger album)

The readers who`ve followed me for a while, know the fatal attraction I have to music. I both listen to and create my own songs, and the very best of them awaken a whirlwind of goosebumps and life stretching towards the sky. Music has been close to my heart since I could open my mouth and let my sounds free. Sometimes they`d got blocked by an impressive number of sturdy walls, but some tones always found their way through the cracks. Today I`ve collected several sounds that crept the long way to my heart, and for that, they deserve extra attention. Not many manage to get that far, and when they do, I never forget them.

It was maybe not strange that the song I`m talking about came from two of the artists I`ve followed since I heard their sound escaping from their

‪Norsk (bokmål)‬: Kurt Nilsen i Ibsenhuset, ...
One of the few who made a career from Idol. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

prisons. When I recognize it, that quality that reminds me of hidden gems, I immediately turned my ears towards it, so I won`t miss another sound onwards. Both artists; Margaret Berger (she was in Eurovision 2013 and in Norwegian Idol many years ago) and Gabrielle (Norwegian Idol) hooked me immediately. Margaret`s first audition was raw, true and showed her hidden talent. She didn`t yet know how great she was, but somehow I felt it. I crossed my fingers and hoped she would win. She didn`t win. She got the second place, which didn`t matter at all, since she already was a winner and probably needed to go her own way anyway. She was the first Norwegian winner (after the winner of world Idol, Kurt Nilsen) that really made it. I followed my shining star proudly, and went to the two concerts she had in Bergen. I even got her autograph, not caring I`d had to stand in line with a bunch of 13-year olds. I still cheer internally when I hear her name, and my respect for her is if possible even greater than it was for the shy girl who just wanted to sing. This respect has now grown to something that equals love, as far as something can when one doesn`t know the person, when I discovered she had teamed up with my other favorite Idol-artist.She must have seen the qualities I saw, or maybe Gabrielle saw hers? No matter how and why, they have in fact come together and made a song. It is a cover, and I hadn`t heard the original before. What my ears and soul do recognize, is this: Magic does happen. All the time.

My heart flutters. Another treasure to my growing chest of wonders. 
Margaret Berger & Gabrielle – Help Me Lose My Mind (

Margaret Berger: ‘Human Race’ (

Eurovision 2013 to be Re-broadcast in China (

NORWAY : Full Video of Margaret Berger’s Eurovision Follow Up Single (

color the boxes of defintion

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Lifting old thoughts from dusty ruts. Polishing them carefully before putting them on a display. It will be a proper display with matching, beautiful colors that shine along with their value.

Most of the time, we use only one end or the other of a contrast at a time.  These ends are called characteristics or, especially in reference to the characteristics of people,  traits.   But the other end is a

Things float without a system

lways there, lurking in the background.  You can’t have one without the other — good without bad, up without down.

Please note that these contrast need not be verbal:  My cat knows the difference between the expensive cat food and the cheap stuff, yet can’t tell you about it;  an infant contrasts between mommy and non-mommy; wild animals contrast safe areas and dangerous ones, etc.  Even adult humans sometimes “just know” without being about to say — unconscious contrasts, if you like:  what is it about that person that you like or dislike?

Pieces coming together

Contrasts don’t just float around independently, either.  We interrelate and organize them.  For example, we can  define  a category:  “Women are adult female human beings.”  Or we can go a step further and organize things into  taxonomies,  those tree-like structures we come across in biology:  A Siamese is a kind of cat, which is a kind of carnivore, which is a kind of mammal, which is a kind of vertebrate….

Or we can put contrasts into more temporal structures, like  rules.   These are often called schemas or scripts.  You can find explicit examples in books about card games, etiquette, or grammar; but you know quite a few rule systems yourself, even if they have become so automatic as to be unconscious!

Not all organization of contrasts are so tightly structured.  We can  describe  something:  “Women are delicate.”  As the example is intended to suggest, descriptions, as opposed to definitions, need not be true!   Beliefs  are similar to, but looser than, taxonomies.  Whereas birds definitely (i.e. by definition) are vertebrates and have feathers, it is only my belief that they all fly — I could be wrong!  Stereotypes are examples of beliefs; so are opinions.  But some beliefs are so strongly held that we see them as definite.

There are also  narratives — the stories we have in our minds.  These are temporal, like rules, but are amazingly flexible.  They can be a matter of remembered personal experiences, or memorized history lessons, or pure fiction.  I have a suspicion that these contribute greatly to our sense of identity, and that animals don’t have them to the degree we do.





       Good night dear followers. Sleep tight. 





I will also get some sleep and dream up my next stories

More basic psychology on:

The Simplest Defintio and What Are We Really?

How Important Dads Can Be For Their Children

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By now most scientists agree that humans are a product of both genes and environment, working together. Even if genes might influence our personality, the situation around us can mold and shape it until we have become ourselves. An interesting question when it comes to this, is what influences us in the environment, so that we know what to do when something goes wrong.

The following video will focus on research that explore how fathers influence their kids and shape what choices they take later in life. For example, research shows that girls who have a good relationship with her father, chooses partners with similar personalities, and who actually LOOK the same. More, women who have her partner present while giving birth, and who touches her, release more oxytocin that relieve pain, having an easier child-birth. Moreover, no matter how much testosterone a man has before they become fathers, levels drop to one-third when they hold the newborns in their arms. This and more in the video below.

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My life as a psychologist: The start of this blog

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It Is strange that it’s been 9 months since I started this blog. Since then when I was sure no one would be interested in reading my posts, I have found so many interesting people in the blog-sphere and some of them have really inspired me with their stories. I am so thankful for the comments and people actually finding inspiration here: Seeing how much horror there can be in the world, it means so much to feel able to do some small things to make it better.

For new readers who haven’t followed me from the beginning, I present what I wrote for the first time on this blog. I knew nothing about blogging, and was so anxious. But I continued, and now I can’t imagine that I’ll ever quit. Thank you, faithful followers, and welcome
To those who have just found this
Blog. I am absolutely thrilled when I get feedback, both good and ‘bad’, so don’t feel afraid of contacting me. I believe in friendships across borders.

  • Narrative: Introduction


    Many people wonder: Where do I begin when they get the chance to tell their story. Since I work with people every day, I have heard many variants, and I will personally choose the `overview` variant to give you an idea of who I am and how I became that way. I am already, in the age of 26 (27 tomorrow) eager to share my story, and hope this might give me many fascinating stories in return.

    I have always been interested in other people. I guess that explains hours spent on movies, reading and reality shows. Today I work with what I love, talking to people from 8-16 as a therapist. People often ask : Don’t you get tired of it? My answer still is: No! Even if I read hundred books, I never get tired of that either. Some books are better than others of course, but I love it when I find something that manage to surprise me, and humans never stop to amaze me. Every person has their own personality, that you usually grasp automatically based on intuition, that unexplained x-factor that make you love and hate, sometimes because of unknown reasons. To hear how someone became like they are, is like opening a gift box. You may have an inkling of what might come, but it never ceases to surprise me. It can be a touching description of somebody’s day, for example how they worried that their mother would be hit by a car, or a summary of their childhood. It can be how they talk, dress and behave, and even better, when you get to share a moment of transformation in the therapy room.
    I feel in many ways that I have an essence, but outwardly and inwardly I have also changed a lot. When I look at video-camera footage of myself, I almost get a bit ashamed. Was that me? How could I be so obnoxious? The same thing happens when I look at my writing from back then. I could not understand what I did wrong, now it blinks and announces itself with great vigor, and I have to smile at how pleased I was then.

    I hope my life story will be an inspiration and a journey inside my mind. It’s full of sad, happy and normal memories, but I know nobody out there has exactly the same story as me, in that case I would like to meet you very much! If you have questions along the way, please feel free to ask.